I'm Known As the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Arnold Schwarzenegger Comedy: An Interview.
The action icon is best known as an action movie legend. But, in the midst of his star power in the late 20th century, he also starred in several surprisingly great comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which marks its 35-year mark this December.
The Film and That Line
In the hit comedy, Schwarzenegger plays a tough police officer who poses as a kindergarten teacher to track down a criminal. Throughout the story, the crime storyline acts as a simple backdrop for the star to have charming scenes with children. Arguably the most famous involves a student named Joseph, who unprompted rises and states the stoic star, “It's boys who have a penis, and girls get a vagina.” Arnold deadpans, “I appreciate the insight.”
The young actor was portrayed by child star Miko Hughes. In addition to this part featured a recurring role on Full House playing the antagonist to the Olsen twins and the haunting part of the child who returns in the 1989 adaptation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He still works in film today, with a slate of movies in development. Furthermore, he engages with fans at the con circuit. Not long ago shared his memories from the set of Kindergarten Cop after all this time.
Memories from the Set
Interviewer: First, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?
Miko Hughes: I think I was four. I was the most junior of all the kids on set.
That's impressive, I can't remember being four. Do you have any memories from that time?
Yeah, a little bit. They're brief images. They're like mental photographs.
Do you recall how you got the part in Kindergarten Cop?
My family, especially my mother would bring me to auditions. Often it was a mass tryout. There'd be 20, 30 kids and we'd all patiently queue, go into the room, be in there less than five minutes, do whatever little line they wanted and that was it. My parents would coach me on the dialogue and then, once I learned to read, that was the initial content I was reading.
Do you have any recollection of meeting Arnold? What was your take on him?
He was very kind. He was fun. He was pleasant, which arguably stands to reason. It'd be weird if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom, that likely wouldn't create a productive set. He was fun to be around.
“It would have been odd if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom.”
I understood he was a major movie star because my family informed me, but I had barely seen his movies. I sensed the excitement — like, that's cool — but he wasn't scary to me. He was merely entertaining and I just wanted to play with him when he wasn't busy. He was occupied, of course, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would dangle from his limbs. He'd show his strength and we'd be hanging off. He was incredibly giving. He gifted all the students in the classroom a yellow cassette player, which at the time was the hottest tech. This was the must-have gadget, that distinctive classic yellow cassette player. I listened to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for a long time on that thing. It finally gave out. I also received a real silver whistle. He had the referee's whistle, and the kids all received one too as well.
Do you remember your days on set as being enjoyable?
You know, it's amusing, that movie is such a landmark. It was such a big movie, and it was a wonderful time, and you would think, as an adult, I would want my memories to be of working with Arnold, the legendary director, visiting Astoria, being on a professional set, but my memories are of being a selective diner at lunch. For example, they got everyone pizza, but I didn't even like pizza. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the Nintendo Game Boy was new. That was the big craze, and I was pretty good at it. I was the youngest and some of the older kids would bring me their Game Boys to get past hard parts on games because I could do it, and I was quite pleased with myself. So, it's all childhood recollections.
The Line
OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember anything about it? Did you understand the words?
At the time, I likely didn't understand what the word provocative meant, but I knew it was provocative and it made adults laugh. I understood it was kind of something I shouldn't normally say, but I was given approval in this case because it was funny.
“It was a difficult decision for her.”
How it was conceived, from what I understand, was they hadn't finalized all the dialogue. A few scenes were established early on, but once they had the entire ensemble assembled, it wasn't necessarily improv, but they refined it on set and, reportedly it's either the director or producers came to my mom and said, "There's a concept. We want Miko to have this line. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't agree right away. She said, "Let me think about it, I'll decide tomorrow" and took a short while. She deliberated carefully. She said she wasn't sure, but she believed it could end up as one of the unforgettable moments from the movie and her instinct was correct.